


at your side

by kagshina



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Comfort, Fluff, M/M, Post Season 3, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-12 22:17:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11746299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kagshina/pseuds/kagshina
Summary: “Sorry, sorry,” Lance says, dropping his arms back to his side. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”“You didn’t scare me,” Keith mutters, but they both know that’s not true.(Or, Lance and Keith get a moment to themselves in all the chaos.)





	at your side

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place shortly after the end of season 3!
> 
> A huge thanks to Cam over at keithsbelt on tumblr for making some awesome edits, and a thanks to Sara at rainybayards for reading through and making sure everything flowed okay.

The castle is quiet.

It’s unsettling, Keith thinks, to be surrounded by so much silence when up until this point, everything’s been so loud.

It doesn’t feel right. Lotor and his team are out there, they could be hurting people, and Keith is just sitting here, doing nothing. He wants to do something, but his body is exhausted; it's doubtful he'd even be able to lift his bayard in this state, let alone swing it.

Despite the fatigue, for once he can’t sleep. Of course, when he needs it most, that’s when he can’t get it.

Every time he started drifting off to sleep, his mind would jolt him awake with a new sudden thought, a new fear, a new stress. He kept replaying the events of the past few days, trying to figure out where we made mistakes, how he could be better.

True black paladin. That still didn’t make any sense to him. How could he be the true black paladin?

Keith sighs, staring out the window, absently watching the stars. That’s when a noise from behind interrupts the silence.

He jumps to his feet and turns, not sure what he’s expecting, but what he finds definitely isn’t it. His shoulders drop, his body relaxing. Lance is standing in front of him, wide eyed, holding out his hands defensively. He looks slightly amused.

“Sorry, sorry,” Lance says, dropping his arms back to his side. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me,” Keith mutters, but they both know that’s not true.

Lance’s lip pulls up, and it’s just barely noticeable, but Keith still sees it. “You should be asleep,” Lance tells him, as if he can't fathom why Keith is awake in front of him, restless and worried about the worlds beyond their sight.

“So should you,” Keith shoots back.

Lance laughs, and it catches Keith off guard with how comforting he finds the sound. You’ve missed it, the back of his mind tells him, but he tries not to dwell on why.

“I woke up and I was thirsty, so I decided to get some water,” Lance says with a shrug. “What’s your excuse?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

Lance actually smiles at that, and Keith is about to ask why when Lance says, “I always thought that once your head hit the pillow, you were out.” His tone is playful, and it lifts some of the pressure from Keith’s shoulders. Even in the middle of a war, even when everything feels like a mess, Lance is still Lance, and Keith admires him so, so much.

Keith just rolls his eyes, letting a smile find it’s way to his face. “You should go back to sleep,” he suggests, partly because it’s important that the team is well rested, and partly because he doesn’t know what else to say.

“So should you,” Lance parrots Keith’s own words back to him, and he’s right, obviously, but he doesn't want to lay in bed again waiting for a sleep that won’t come.

Keith sighs, barely audible. “I will eventually.”

Lance steps forward then, plopping down right next to where Keith had been sitting. “Cool. I’ll sit with you until you do,” Lance decides, looking up at Keith, who can only stare back, confusion clear on his face.

“You don’t have to stay up with me,” he finally manages to get out.

“I don’t mind.”

Keith pauses before he sighs again and sits back down next to Lance, who’s still looking at him with an emotion that he can’t identify. It makes Keith nervous.

“What?” Keith asks, almost expecting Lance to make fun of him or something.

Instead, Lance responds with a question of his own. “What were you thinking about?”

“Uh,” Keith starts, not having expected that. “I don’t know,” he finishes, crossing his arms over his chest as he leans slightly forward, his knees supporting his arms.

Lance laughs again, and if Keith was a little more tired, maybe he’d tell him that he likes the way it sounds. But he hasn’t reached that point of exhaustion yet, so he says nothing.

“Are you saying that because you really don’t know or because you don’t want to tell me?”

Keith thinks about it for a moment before answering honestly, “Both.”

Lance nods, understanding, and then he takes his eyes off Keith, letting them rest on the stars outside the castle.

Keith’s eyes stay on Lance for a moment longer before he follows Lance’s gaze to the window, silence settling back around them.

He feels… relaxed. Not entirely, but more so than he has in a while, and that counts for something. (It counts for a lot.)

He wishes he was better at words, that there was some way he could thank Lance for everything he’s done over the last few days. Keith isn’t sure what kind of leader he’d be without Lance by his side, but it’s not something he’s eager to imagine.

He doesn’t understand why Black chose him, but he’s trying to be what the team needs. He’s trying not to let them down, but he’s not sure how well he’s managing.

Without thinking, he glances at Lance, who’s still looking out the window. He looks lost in thought, like Keith had been. Before Keith can stop himself he’s asking, “What are you thinking about?”

Lance jumps slightly at the sudden noise, which is… kind of adorable, and then he grins. “I don’t know.”

Keith rolls his eyes, but his lips lift up in a half smile nonetheless. He decides to play along. “Are you saying that because you don’t know or because you don’t want me to know?”

Lance’s smile grows wider. “Both.”

Keith shakes his head in amusement. He takes a deep breath before asking, “If I tell you what I was thinking, will you tell me what you were thinking?”

Lance nods without hesitation. “Yeah.”

Keith looks away, letting his eyes drift to the floor as he bites at the inside of his mouth, trying to find a way to put his thoughts into words.

“I hate that we’re doing nothing,” Keith says finally, and before he can go any further Lance interjects.

“It’s not noth—”

Keith interrupts him. “I know, I know. We’re resting. It’s important. But it still feels like nothing. I hate that Lotor’s still out there, and he could be hurting people, and we’re just here.” Keith lets out a frustrated groan. “Every second we sit here is another second for him to be doing something.”

Lance is quiet, and Keith doesn’t risk a glance in his direction. He keeps his eyes on the floor, waiting, for a response, a lecture, an argument, anything.

After a moment, Lance says, “It sucks. I know how you feel. I think that’s how we all feel. We want to be out there saving people, but instead we’re sleeping. It feels like we’re letting him win, yeah?”

Keith nods, because that’s exactly what it feels like. Every second that passes that they’re not attacking makes it feel like Lotor’s winning this war. “Yeah.”

“He’s not winning,” Lance goes on. “And he’s not going to win. We’re going to rest, and then we’re going to go out there, and we’re going to find him. We won’t stop until we do.”

Keith looks at Lance then, and there’s a fierceness in his eyes, a determination. Lance would be a good leader, Keith thinks.

“I wish Black would have chosen you,” Keith confesses quietly.

Lance’s eyes widen, and he opens his mouth, and then closes it, like he’s trying to find a response that won’t come. When he opens it again, all he says is, “Wha- why?”

“Because..” Keith starts, turning his eyes to the window, “You know how to inspire people. That’s what leaders do, isn’t it?” Keith swallows, letting out a breath. “You always know what to say. You keep the team together.”

He can feel Lance’s eyes on him, and he lets himself turn his head so that they’re facing each other. There’s a mix of emotions there that Keith can’t quite read, so he doesn’t try to.

“You’re brave,” Lance says.

Before he can go any further, Keith counters with, “We’re paladins of Voltron. We’re all brave.”

Lance rolls his eyes. “Would you let me finish?”

“Sorry,” Keith sighs, nodding.

“You’re brave,” Lance starts again, “And you’re decisive in tough situations. You’re doing the best you can even though you never asked to be the leader. I’m not going to pretend that you’re perfect, but not even Shiro was perfect. You’re doing the best you can and we all respect that.” Lance’s expression is so genuine, that it makes Keith’s chest feel… weird. Kind of heavy, and full.

The corner of Lance’s mouth pulls up as he goes on. “You’ve learned a lot since Black chose you, and you’re taking what you’ve learned and you’re using it. That’s what makes you a good leader, Keith. You learn from your mistakes.”

Keith’s eyes widen, and he realizes that Lance is being completely honest with him right now. He’s not trying to act like Keith is the exact leader they need, but he’s not trying to tear him down, either. If anything, he’s trying to lift him up.

He’s telling him how it is while still being supportive, and Keith doesn’t know what to say to that. This is still new to him, the two of them talking without bickering. The two of them leaning on each other for support instead.

It’s the kind of new he wouldn’t mind getting used to.

“I would be nothing without you guys,” Keith says, because if he’s even half the leader Shiro is, it’s because of his team, because he learns from them.

Lance smiles. “It’s a good thing you have us then.”

Keith finds himself smiling back, averting his gaze for a moment before it finds his way back to Lance, who’s still looking at him, still smiling. He thinks his face feels warmer than usual.

“Yeah,” Keith agrees, nodding. “It is.”

A silence passes between them, and they both return to looking out the window.

“I thought Black would choose Allura,” Lance says suddenly.

“So did I,” Keith admits. He hadn’t spent much time thinking about who Black would choose, just hoping it wouldn’t be him. Allura felt like the obvious choice. She’s a good leader, definitely better than Keith.

“Is it weird?” Lance asks, “Piloting Black when Shiro’s here?”

“So weird,” Keith answers without hesitation, because it doesn’t feel right. Shiro was supposed to take over when he came back. It doesn’t make any sense to Keith. “And I miss Red.”

When he looks over Lance is grinning. “You might not get Red back, I think she’s growing attached to me.”

Keith makes a quiet sound, something between a laugh and an exhale. “What happened to you and Blue being happy together?”

He asks the question in a light hearted tone, but Lance’s face drops, and Keith feels his heart take a nervous beat, worried that he’s just ruined the peace between them.

“She shut me out,” Lance says, and the sadness on his face is obvious. “And I know it was probably just because I had to pilot Red, but it still kind of sucks.” Lance sighs. “I thought she hated me.”

A second passes and then Lance is swinging his hands in the air, shaking his head. “I’m not saying that I’m not happy to be piloting Red! Red and I are a great match. I just—miss Blue.”

Keith nods in understanding. “I know how you feel.”

There’s a pause, and then, “Do you think things will ever go back to normal?”

“I don’t know, but I hope so,” Keith answers honestly, and he wishes there was more for him to say, but he really, really doesn’t have any idea. He looks down at the ground, and then remembering their deal, says, “You said you’d tell me what you were thinking about if I told you.”

“I was thinking about my family,” Lance tells him, and Keith isn’t all that surprised. Unsure how to respond Keith stays quiet, but luckily he doesn’t have to because Lance goes on. “They think I’m dead,” he says, and there’s an emptiness to his voice that Keith’s never heard before, that he doesn’t want to hear again. “I’d give anything to tell them I’m okay.”

Keith still isn’t quite sure what to say, but now there’s a tear rolling down Lance’s cheek, so before he can think of a reason not to, he repositions himself so that he can comfortably wrap his arms around Lance’s wide shoulders.

It’s awkward, there’s no denying that, and it catches Lance off guard, but eventually he’s wrapping his arms around Keith, too, and they’re hugging, and even though it was meant to comfort Lance, he can’t help but feel it was for his own benefit, as well.

“I’m sorry,” he says finally, with his arms still around Lance. He wishes there was more he could say, wishes he could promise him that they’ll be okay, that he’ll be able to see his family again, but he doesn’t know that. He’s in no position to make that kind of promise to Lance.

Lance doesn’t say anything, and that’s okay, they just stay like that for a moment longer, until they’re both pulling away awkwardly, avoiding eye contact.

“That was kind of weird, right?” Lance asks, and Keith thinks that he sounds kind of nervous.

“Yeah, but, uh, not a bad weird.”

Lance lets out what seems to be a sigh of relief, and then he’s grinning. “I can’t believe you have a soft side, Keith.”

Lance bumps his shoulder against Keith’s, and Keith rolls his eyes, ignoring the heat that comes to his cheeks. “Shut up.”

Lance shakes his head, amused, and they fall into a comfortable silence. He stares out the window, the exhaustion starting to get him. Before he knows it, he’s yawning.

“You should go to sleep,” Lance says, and Keith knows he’s right, knows he’s probably tired enough to actually fall asleep, but now he doesn’t want to.

If he goes to sleep, then he’ll wake up in the morning and everything will be loud again, and he’ll have to be the leader, and the world will be counting on him.

Right now, he just wants to sit with Lance, and listen to his laugh, and pretend that they’re not in the middle of a war.

“I want to stay here for a little longer,” Keith says, “If you don’t mind.”

“I don’t mind,” Lance tells him, and Keith catches his eye.

There’s a lot of things Keith wants to say, but all that comes out is, “Thanks.”

Lance nods, and then he’s looking at Keith like he wants to say something, but he isn’t sure how. That’s a feeling Keith’s familiar with.

He waits, letting Lance work through his thoughts, and then he hears, “Hey Keith,” from beside him. It sounds hesitant.

“Yeah?”

“Do you remember when I came to talk to you? In your room?”

Keith isn’t sure where Lance is going with this, but he nods. “Yeah, of course. You wanted to talk to me because I’m the leader.”

Lance bites down on his lip, shaking his head. He’s not looking at Keith directly. “That’s not the only reason.”

Keith can feel his heart beating faster, but he ignores it, remains as cool and collected as he can. “What do you mean?”

“I wanted to talk to you because you’re my friend,” Lance tells him, and that one sentence manages to lift some invisible weight from his shoulders.

“Oh,” is all Keith manages to get out, staring at Lance. He thinks that saying anything else would give away the frantic pounding of his heart and the emotion lodged in his throat.

“Anyway,” Lance starts, and now he looks a little disappointed, like that’s not the reaction he’d been hoping for, and Keith wants to go back and say something else, but it’s too late because Lance is already talking again. “I just, I know you told me that things would work themselves out, but I guess, I don’t know. I just feel like you guys don’t need me sometimes, and—”

Keith stops him there. “Lance,” he says, voice soft but firm. “When you told me you were coming to talk because I was the leader, I felt disappointed. I thought that meant you didn’t actually want to be talking to me about it, you just felt obligated to. And… I think that kind of upset me, because you’re my friend too. And I don’t want you to talk to me just because I’m the leader. I want you to talk to me because you want to.”

“I do want to,” Lance rushes to get in, before Keith keeps going, a warmth settling in his chest at Lance’s statement.

“So right now, I’m saying as your friend that we wouldn’t be a team without you. We need you.” Keith pauses, before adding, “I need you.”

Lance looks at him, surprise evident on his face, and before Keith has a chance to overthink it, he keeps talking. It could be now or never.

“I couldn’t do this without you. You’re…” Keith takes a deep breath, and then meets Lance’s eye. “You’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever met, and I know we haven’t always gotten along, and I know we still don’t, sometimes, but I admire you. And you’re important to me.”

Lance is staring at him with wide eyes, lips parted. Keith feels vulnerable, and scared, because he’d never planned on saying any of those things to Lance, and he doesn’t know what to expect.

But Lance deserves to know, so even though his heart is beating rapidly in his chest, he doesn’t regret opening up. He doesn’t regret being honest.

Before Keith knows what’s happening, Lance is launching himself forward, arms wrapping around Keith. “That’s what you should have said before,” Lance says, giving Keith a final squeeze before pulling away. Now Keith is the one left staring.

“You really mean all of that?” Lance asks, and Keith finds himself nodding.

“I mean it.”

“Thank you,” Lance says, and then, “I admire you too, you know.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

And Keith can’t help it, he smiles. He smiles because a few hours ago, everything was an absolute mess. But now here they are, and all of that feels so far away, and Keith knows that the mess will return, but right now, he’s happy.

Right now, in this moment, he can pretend that everything is okay.

Lance smiles too, and tentatively, Keith holds his hand out between them. He watches as Lance grabs his hand, giving it a squeeze. Keith squeezes back.

“We should go to sleep,” Lance says, and even though Keith really doesn’t want to, he knows Lance is right.

“Okay,” Keith agrees with a nod, but they both stay seated for a moment longer, hands together.

Finally, Lance lets go of Keith’s hand to get up, and Keith follows. The air between them feels different, but… not entirely uncomfortable.

They walk towards their rooms in silence, and Keith wishes the walk was longer, because before he knows it, they’re standing in front of his door.

“Keith,” Lance says, and the way Lance’s name sounds coming out of his mouth makes Keith feel warm, and like maybe things will be okay. “Thank you.”

Keith shakes his head. “You don’t have to thank me. I didn’t do anything.”

“You made me feel better.”

“You did the same for me,” Keith tells him, and he thinks Lance’s cheeks turn a light shade of red.

“Whatever happens tomorrow, I’ll be at your side.”

“And I’ll be at yours.”

There’s a promise in their eyes, and Keith can feel that something’s changed between them, but as he steps inside his room and closes the door, he knows that’s a good thing.

  
The castle is quiet, but his heart definitely isn’t.

**Author's Note:**

> So... I thought I was done with Klance, and then season 3 happened. 
> 
> I think I'm gonna pick up an unfinished Klance soulmate AU that I started a while back.


End file.
